Do you remember a time when you saw yourself on film? Or heard a record of your voice? Try and remember. “Oh no… It can’t be… I don’t look like that… That’s not my voice…” Have you ever felt that way? Sadly, this is exactly how other people see us. The only person whose voice I cannot hear and whose expressions, body language, and actions I cannot see is me.
Unexpected information about yourself is always followed by greater or smaller shock. Or other powerful emotions. Or loss of balance. It takes time to return to your normal self. It takes time to think everything over. To avoid being defensive, that is, beginning to argue or withdraw, it is useful to say: “Thank you for telling me. Now I need some time to process this information.”