Author Of The Website
Ligita Jakučionytė
Author of the website “Thank You For Telling Me” Ligita Jakučionytė is a supervisor, lecturer, columnist of the psychology journal Psichologija Tau and author of a book for children on feedback.
She teaches understanding yourself through relationships with others, listening and hearing, and focuses mainly on professional relationships. Her main principles are communication, feedback, honesty, and confidentiality.
What does it mean?
“Thank You For Telling Me”
Do you remember a time when you saw yourself on film? Or heard a record of your voice? Try and remember. “Oh no… It can’t be… I don’t look like that… That’s not my voice…” Have you ever felt that way? Sadly, this is exactly how other people see us. The only person whose voice I cannot hear and whose expressions, body language, and actions I cannot see is me.
Unexpected information about yourself is always followed by greater or smaller shock. Or other powerful emotions. Or loss of balance. It takes time to return to your normal self. It takes time to think everything over. To avoid being defensive, that is, beginning to argue or withdraw, it is useful to say: “Thank you for telling me. Now I need some time to process this information.”
The most difficult task is finding the strength to look at yourself and ask: “What do you think about me? What kind of worker, colleague, neighbour, wife/husband, friend – or even mother/father am I?” After this first part – directing your thinking away from others and towards yourself– everything becomes easier. Promise!
Any kind of learning begins with learning to listen. To listen without becoming defensive, or criticising, or comparing. Simply listening. And showing respect. Focusing. Giving yourself time to absorb the information. And saying thank you. Thank you for telling me…